In the work environment, interaction and communication between team members is essential to achieve joint actions and achieve the objectives set by the organization.
We all go to our work under the understanding that the relationship with co-workers, as they are the people with whom we will spend a good part of our day, should be harmonious or at least cooperative to reach the goals together.
However, sometimes cases of negative interactions can arise, in which mobbing or harassment is the protagonist and is manifested through behaviors that end up becoming obstacles to cultivating a healthy work environment: gossip, envy for the achievements of colleagues , signs of condescension, interference with the work of other team members, exclusion, verbal and psychological aggression, which can even reach physical violence or inadmissible situations such as sexual harassment.
According to a survey carried out by Statista in 2019, around 12.3% of those surveyed in Mexico said they had been victims of harassment in the workplace. 44% of people who reported having suffered workplace harassment were victims of sexual harassment.
Among the forms of psychological and verbal violence can be found the so-called gas lighting either gas lighta concept that refers to denying reality or distorting it through actions such as assuming events that never happened, lying or manipulating information so that the victim comes to doubt their own judgment, perception or memory.
The term gas lighting comes from the British play gas-light from 1933, which was later made into a film in 1944 by George Cukor. Since the 1970s it has been used to describe efforts to manipulate a person’s sense of reality.
The gas lighting It is a very frequent type of psychological violence in family, friendship or partner relationships, but it has also been observed in work relationships. It can happen between co-workers, from bosses to employees, and from employees to bosses.
Those who exercise gas lighting They can reach such a degree of falsehood and manipulation that they can alter the perception of the rest of the team about the victim, which can put their position and their work in the company in difficulty, even when it is good. The objective of the aggressor is to turn others against the victim through criticism or questioning of their behavior, their criteria, their abilities, their reasoning and perception, and even make the victim never be able to express her concerns or discomfort. .
The gas lighting It is a very subtle, Machiavellian and cowardly type of harassment, in which the harasser makes the victim doubt their memory and/or sanity. Usually the aggressor praises his victim in public while attacking him in private. In this way there are no witnesses and the victim cannot prove or prove that she is being attacked and harassed, as explained in an article by the School of Business and Management.
How to identify that a team member is gaslighting?
Due to the characteristics of this type of workplace violence, in most cases it is not easy to identify the gas lighting but until it has had serious consequences such as the development of a harmful work environment that, among other ways, can manifest itself with the dismissal of those who have suffered this type of aggression.
That is why here we share some signs that, according to Psychology Todaycan help you identify if someone on your team, be it a colleague or boss, is exercising gas lighting towards you or towards another colleague:
- Constant negative narrative about the victim’s performance, credibility, products or services. In the gas lighting the aggressor will make negative comments about the victim based on personal judgements. He will also make false or biased accusations.
- Persistent negative gossip about the personal and/or professional characteristics of the victim. Being a form of passive aggression, the gas lighting It is a type of psychological violence that is difficult to identify. The aggressor usually sows rumors and gossip behind the victim’s back, although he can also do it publicly, everything will depend on what suits him in each situation.
- Constant negative publicity or public comments. If the attacker decides to make his attacks public, he will take advantage of any situation such as reports, memos, meetings, online, face-to-face, individually or in a group, in performance reviews, customer evaluations and other scenarios. Slander is based on falsehoods or exaggerations and not on evidence and concrete facts, which damages the professional credibility and personal reputation of the victim.
- Persistent sarcasm and negative humor. As part of gas lighting, the aggressor expresses his hostility or condescension disguised as humor / sarcasm to annoy, mock, minimize or marginalize the victim, followed by a “joke”. Given the possible annoyance or complaint of the victim, the aggressor will excuse himself by saying that the victim “is exaggerated”, “is very sensitive”, “can’t stand anything” or that she “never said that”.
- Frequent professional exclusion. This type of aggression is made invisible to the victim, excluding him from work meetings, ignoring him during them, hiding information from him. This type of aggression can lead to serious consequences such as exclusion from professional networks and job opportunities such as development, raises, promotions and leadership even when the victim has the skills and is qualified.
- Persistent and verifiable unfair treatment. If the aggressor is a team leader, the victim will be treated unfairly compared to other employees of similar or lesser experience and achievement, regardless of whether the victim makes positive collaboration and notable contributions.
How to stop gaslighting in the work team?
After seeing these signs of gas lighting At work, it is important to act whether you are a team leader or an employee, because in addition to the psychological consequences of this form of aggression, there are the labor consequences, which range from the effects on the victim, to the damage to the work environment .
Some recommended measures to put a stop to gas lighting or prevent it are:
Like an employer
Speaks out If you notice constant hostile treatment from your boss or a teammate, do not doubt your feeling, discuss it with a trusted colleague or directly with another team leader in case your boss is the aggressor.
Don’t look for external approval, Because sometimes, for not wanting to generate conflict, you can let the aggression of your partner or boss pass by, but always think: what is it that really prevents you from putting a stop and demanding respect or making the problem visible?
Aggressions can be like a snowball, they can start with apparently harmless acts and end with great damage. Do not remain silent before actions or comments that you feel aggressive, because this way you can clarify and discover if it is simply a disagreement or if it is someone trying to manipulate you to distort your perception and make you doubt what you feel or think in the face of aggression.
Always keep in mind sovereignty over your thoughts and feelings. Do not apologize for feeling or be ashamed of what you feel, because your thoughts and feelings should not be subject to discussion. If you feel any hostile treatment from a colleague or your boss, do not minimize what you feel, talk to the person in question and express how he made you feel. If the person changes his behavior, it may just have been a misunderstanding. But if you notice that this treatment is constant and continues even when you have expressed your annoyance and demanded respect, discuss it with your leader or with another colleague.
As a leader
Listen and observe the behavior of each member of your team. If you notice someone constantly attacking another co-worker during daily interactions, or if the victim complains directly to you, talk to both the aggressor and the potential victim to get both sides’ sides.
Remember that a difficult conversation is better on time with the alleged aggressor that serious consequences that affect the victim or the performance of the entire team, that is, not to avoid a conflict that in your eyes might seem small, ends up becoming a bigger problem.
Develop your criteria and avoid getting carried away by gossip. As gossip is one of the aggressor’s ways of manipulating, it is most likely that they may come to you with a rumor or negative comment about another member of the team. Analyze the comment and try to get evidence to support it. Otherwise, again listening and observation are key to discerning between something that may be real or gossip that has the intention of harming someone else.
Cultivate a culture of respect. Maintain high standards of behavior with your team, if necessary list and communicate possible behaviors that will be inadmissible in any member of your team. Honesty in work interactions is one of the keys to guaranteeing harmony in the team and avoiding aggression between colleagues.
Remind your team of the importance of honest communication. Among the behaviors that you should never admit in your team is the spread of rumors and gossip about anyone. There is nothing productive about spreading false information about someone on the team and, on the other hand, it can have harmful effects both for the victim and for the performance of the entire team.
Rocio Reyes Communicologist specialized in science journalism and digital marketing. Curiosity leads this being with a cat personality to find links where there seem to be none. Whenever I can, I like to contribute even a grain of what I have learned. Fan of the world of entrepreneurship and MMA.