After a seven-week binge on Euro 96, the former England defender finally attacked his alcoholism like a true champion, but protecting his mental health proved to be a daily challenge.
“I drank a lot for 12 years and, for most of that time, I didn’t want to give up: I could go to jail, wake up in intensive care or run naked on the street… But somehow, I didn’t. I never thought I had a problem, it was always everyone’s fault except mine, ”Tony Adams told MensHealth.
“Suddenly, things changed. First, my wife underwent [addiction] treatment and my children were taken from me. Then I got injured and I couldn’t play soccer, which was my release, soccer saved me and killed me: if I hadn’t had soccer, maybe I would have learned to deal with my feelings instead of repressing them ”.
One of the main problems in mental health conditions is not asking for help, many of these problems can be treated with talk therapy, that is, talking things over with a mental health professional. According to INEGI data, men have a higher risk of dying from suicide than women, although the number is low (compared to other ways of dying). Suicide from addictions accounts for 7% of total intentional deaths in Mexico,
“I went to see a therapist, and that was what made me aware of myself, everything became unbearable, you know you shouldn’t do that, but you can’t stop. I didn’t want to live and I really didn’t want to die, I realized that “I can’t do this, this is what I mean about living,” he continues. “I stayed sober through AA and its 12 steps. They say the best thing about recovery is that you get your feelings back … and the worst thing about recovery is that you get your feelings back. In 2016, I celebrated 50 years and 20 years of sobriety: great milestones. I recently had heart surgery and felt closer to the end than the beginning. I thought, “Today I have such a good life, I don’t want to die.” It scared me. I was crying like a baby, just crying, it didn’t comfort me at all, I felt paralyzed,
Emotional education is something that we must have from a young age, many times the repression of feelings is part of the male formation, but this far from doing well, it does quite badly. Feelings are part of our humanity and we must know them to avoid major problems.
“That year I was running constantly and lost a lot of weight, after my heart surgery, running seemed like the only way I could say I didn’t have a problem, the only way I could show myself that I was okay,” says Adams, “when I’m depressed, I don’t want to go out, I know it’s the disease: he wants me alone, he doesn’t want me to speak and he wants me to die and I can get trapped there, people see my side of football, the great mask, the great character, but underneath, There is a child who is scared to death. “
“Back in England, my doctor asked me how I felt about antidepressants … Well, today I don’t use drugs, so initially I was not interested” But over time I agreed, now, I am very aware of my depressive side, I am In therapy, I do daily prayers and meditation, by staying sober, day by day, you strengthen yourself and know your feelings. Once, I couldn’t open my mouth. Now, I can’t shut up, “he concludes.
If you or someone in your family is going through an addiction situation you can go to groups like AA or talk to a specialist in the subject, the worst thing we can do is look elsewhere when we face a problem.