In order for you to develop a healthy self-esteem, your child needs you to help him meet these emotional needs because this way he will feel valued, recognized and loved; He will know that his parents accept him as he is, that he must accept himself and make sure that others respect him.
According to the expert in emotional intelligence Eli Martinez, author of the book Create a life your way , children need to have the following vital emotional needs satisfied in order to develop in a healthy way.
YOUR CHILD’S EMOTIONAL NEEDS
Need for love. It provides him with the basic security and confidence in himself and in life, as well as the awareness of being worthy of being for what he is.
Need for presence. When his dad ignores him, they don’t spend time with him, they don’t seek to meet him as a person with all his talents, strengths and weaknesses, it’s as if they didn’t see him and he perceives him. This creates the idea that it is not worthy of people taking it into account. That is why it is important that you spend time with your child and, above all, take advantage to connect emotionally with him and feel you present.
Need for support. Knowing that there is someone there for him, who gives him his support and help when he needs it, fills him with security and confidence to act. Show him and let him know he has you unconditionally.
Need for security. It is not just about satisfying physiological needs such as eating or sleeping, it is about guaranteeing your home, a stable family, health, a safe and harmonious environment during your growth.
Need for validation. Let him feel that it is good to be, feel and think as he does; without experiencing destructive criticism, abuse, prosecution or lack of recognition for their achievements and efforts.
Need for limits . When children have no limits they can have impulsive conflicts, or even narcissism as adults. In fact, the message the child receives from parents who don’t know how to set limits is “I don’t care what you do.” The message should be: “Because I care about you, I want your stability and this is a lesson you need to learn.”
Need for respect. Respect for his likes, dislikes, talents, abilities, emotions, thoughts … even if he is a child, he needs you to accommodate his individuality.
Positive physical contact. Human contact is essential to transmit love; hugs, caresses, kisses, looks … is part of non-verbal communication and therefore, a way of saying I love you.