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If you have a child entering adolescence or “turkey age” and you want to know more about this stage, keep in mind that this article is for you.
The age of the turkey is a period in which physical and physiological changes occur, but also social and emotional. It occurs in the greater frame of adolescence, which goes between 11 and 13 years until 18-19. Together, these are transformations that define and lay the foundation for personal development.
The stage tests the reserves of understanding and tolerance that fathers and mothers have. And as is often the case with all parenting, love and patience will be the best guides to drive the whirlwind of emotions that shake the arrival of puberty.
How to recognize the age of the turkey?
The age of the turkey brings obvious physical changesHence that way of naming it that reminds us of the colorful eye-catching of the bird. As well as the constant twists of humor, which allow you to go from happiness to anger in a matter of seconds.
Physiological transformations
There is a relationship between endocrine activity and the bone system, which will be reflected in rapid growth. Hormones such as thyroxine and insulin will influence height gain.
GH (growth hormone) is key in longitudinal stretching. Thyroid hormones, adrenal androgens, and gonadal sex steroids affect bone maturation. Crucial will be the arrival of the first menstruation and nocturnal pollution.
Physical changes
The physical changes are the most obvious and the ones that cause the greatest surprise among relatives and strangers. They happen in a very short time and they give the body a completely different look than it did before puberty started.
Breast development in women and pubertal growth in both sexes reflect accelerated growth. With equal volume, the male is heavier, due to the muscle mass. On the other hand, the woman’s pelvis increases in width.
Psychological aspects
Mood swings will become frequent and the relationship with the parents will become variable. From dependency to distance, between suspicion and disinterest. In the age of the turkey, abstract thinking and vocational illusions increase, and one is more at the mercy of impulses.
The circle of friends is essential for the adolescent. It is your space for development and fulfillment. If you are insecure about your appearance, with mutual friends these fears dissipate as long as you manage to blend in.
It is also the space to relate to the opposite sex. Or where love encounters begin to explore. The social construction of gender and future sexuality are favored.
5 tips to understand my son during the turkey age
It’s certainly not easy to surf the dizzying waves of puberty. The body image that the mirror returns to the adolescent leads him to consider that he is too exposed to what they will say. And therefore, behaviors are required of him that he has not yet learned.
Being close and supporting our children at this stage is essential to help them break the ice so they can enter life steadily.
1. Comprehension
To be what we want to be, we must leave a part of our lives behind. This requires courage and maturity to deal with solvency situations that can overwhelm the adolescent’s capacity. The natural response to this is some stubbornness..
Let’s be understanding, because it is important to learn from mistakes, but it is not good to make mistakes alone. Learning is a dialogical relationship, so let’s be close to our son.
We are there to support you. Although your stubborn silence may not translate into words, it most likely will translate into a powerful hug.
2. Parents passed by
Let’s never forget that we were teenagers. So, let’s not judge by the stick of years and experience. What we know today we learned there, in the uncertainty, in the doubt between what is due and what is improper.
Let’s remember what we needed. Let’s remember those moments and keep them present and at hand. It can help our son.
3. Communication
Communication with the son or daughter in turkey age is the biggest challenge. As she feels that she is facing a sea of difficulties, she assumes that talking about her project with her parents takes away her energy and determination.
In that moment when you are defeating yourself, talking to him or her may prove fruitless. It will feel like an intrusion.
The words must appear at the time of the inflection preceding the balance. Studies reveal that the boy will turn more to the mother than to his friends, unlike girls, who tend to vent more with friends.
Sooner rather than later the children will leave home and become a family. So while they’re with us Let’s take the opportunity to spend the best moments with them. Special meals, favorite movies, walks that become endearing.
Let’s plan get-togethers with family friends and cousins. Meetings with grandparents also foster the charm of the stories that helped them grow.
5. Respect
Our adolescent son is hypersensitive to questioning. He always thinks he is doing everything right and is engrossed in his reasons.
It is wise to let him go, so that he learns to know his limits. We will know that the time has come to intervene when we see him more absorbed than usual.
If you manage to express what concerns you, let’s move away “I told you” and let’s put the “try again”. In these respects it is worth quote to the disappeared Argentine psychoanalyst Arminda Aberastury (Buenos Aires, 1910-1972):
“Until today the study of adolescence focused only on the adolescent. This approach will always be incomplete if the other side of the problem is not taken into account: the ambivalence and resistance of parents to accept the growth process. “
From the age of the turkey to the awareness of change
There are many myths about adolescence fueled by the need to capture the craving for consumption modeled by the media and social networks. That is to say, the image of a young man or a young woman who achieves her affirmation only through styles and fashions has been built.
Cinema, television and pop culture selflessly overexploit the image of rebellious adolescents without a cause. It is imperative to talk about it with the children so that this stage is assumed with maturity, without created or artificial conflicts.
On the other hand, each head is a world and children do not necessarily have to fulfill the role that society seems to attribute to them. It is true that changes are occurring, but if there is communication and understanding, it is very likely that they will be incorporated into natural and even anecdotal processes.
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