It is that there are many factors, not just age, which determine the way of living motherhood: the level of energy, the economic situation, emotional well-being, the quality of the relationship with the father of the child, health, patience, how easy or difficult we live the pregnancy … The truth is that each stage of life has advantages and disadvantages, even if it is about being a mom. Do we know them?
MOM IN YOUR 30S
Your fertility: disadvantages. From the second half of the decade, the sharpest decline in female fertility is recorded, so there is a tremendous difference between your ability to get pregnant at either end of this range. Therefore, if you have not managed to conceive after a year of trying, with unprotected sex in between, you should seek specialized help, especially if you are around 35 or have already exceeded them.
Your mind: advantages! After a decade of enjoying life, reaching professional and probably financial goals, the idea of stopping with the sole objective of giving yourself over to the swing of the rocking chair, holding a cherub, may seem quite attractive to you.
Now it is very easy to meet other contemporaries with baby, with whom to identify and share experiences. In addition, it is assumed that from the age of thirty women tend to be more stable and calm in our relationships, which, of course, favors motherhood.
Your finances: advantages! Surely you have a well-founded career, which will facilitate your return to the same position after a maternity “disability”, thus maintaining a suitable financial status for the extended family needs. Are you paying for a house? Have you finished paying for the car …? Good for the brand new mom!
Your relationships: advantages and possible disadvantages. Your parents and in-laws may start to have health problems or just feel tired, reducing the spectrum of people you can count on to help you raise your baby. The nice thing is that by this time many of your acquaintances could be growing their family, which would facilitate the creation of “strategic alliances” for mutual aid. Consider it!
Your physical energy: possible disadvantages. Your physical stamina may begin to decline in this decade, so take your precautions: plan your naps regularly during pregnancy, and make sure you have a good helper that spans at least postpartum to your child’s kindergarten entry. .
MOM IN YOUR 40S
Your fertility: disadvantages. Having babies at age 40 or older is common today, and fortunately, pregnancies almost always end normally and babies are born healthy.
It is undeniable, however, that after the fortieth birthday the risks increase: on the one hand, abortion is more frequent; the woman becomes more prone to developing diabetes and hypertension during pregnancy and, last but not least, the child is more likely to have Down syndrome or some other chromosomal abnormality.
Likewise, because mature eggs are more difficult to fertilize, it is necessary to resort to expensive assisted reproductive techniques, which also increase the probability of risky multiple pregnancies. Your mind: advantages! You are at an optimal time to have a child, especially if you recently married or if you fought for a long time against infertility.
Your maturity endows you with remarkable patience, very necessary to meet the demands of a little one. However, inertia is likely to make you feel a little strange about spending so much time with your baby; If so, don’t feel guilty and ask for help to “take a breath.” After all, at this age it is natural to have some difficulty adjusting to your new role.
Your finances: advantages! It is to be hoped that at the moment you are enjoying safety at work and, therefore, economic stability. At the moment, it is best to maintain that status quo, since thinking about drastic changes – like quitting to get a job with fewer hours and thus having more time for the baby – could put your tranquility at risk.
Your relationships: possible disadvantages. You may feel out of place when living with friends your age who had children before you (who are, consequently, much older than your baby), and at the same time you are uncomfortable with women younger than you but with children the age of of yours. Do not worry; By themselves, children are often the point of coincidence in conversations, so that differences in maternal ages do not matter so much as the desire to exchange experiences and share pleasant moments.
Your physical energy: disadvantages. Fatigue may become part of your daily routine, either from pregnancy or after the birth of your baby. Don’t push yourself, simply annihilate all kinds of energy “thieves”: bad eating habits, sedentary lifestyle, unnecessary sleeplessness, excessive stress …
Either way, now you have “charms” to make up for such a drawback: more equanimity, a better perspective on reality and greater serenity when facing difficulties.
There is no perfect age, what we can do is talk about trends: only from the elementary biological point of view, it is much more likely to father a child at 20 than at 40. In the same way, there is for whom it is easier to be a playful mom at 30 than at 42, and pay a better maternity sanitarium
when she gives birth at 30 than when she hires the same service with just 20 springs. However, what really matters is that you enjoy your motherhood to make your child a happy child.