5 minutes
The authoritarian parenting style imposes the rules vertically from parent to child, without dialogue or consensus. Affection and affection are reduced, diminishing confidence and autonomy.
The family is the first and main area of influence in the formation of children. The father and mother will transmit values, principles, traditions, guidelines and roles in a complex whole in which grandparents and uncles participate. Assuming an authoritarian or permissive parenting style will have advantages and disadvantages that are worth knowing.
In this article we will address the main characteristics of the authoritarian style. Some preconceptions make us believe that when it comes to raising we are arbitrary or not. However, perhaps the most important thing will be to know when to be effective and transcendent.
Educating implies attitudes and behaviors of the parents depending on whether the children achieve certain behaviors. Authoritarian parenting style can be reciprocal or repressive. The first part of the establishment of consensual limits; the second controls through repression, punishment and even violence.
Regardless of compliance or compliance with authority, it establishes verticality and unidirectionality. They are rules or procedures that are offered without discussion and as the fruit of a foolproof experience.
This style develops in parents an attitude prone to irritation and severity. It is also reflected in people who appear to always be in control and know the pros and cons in advance. It commits adults and the family as a whole to the pressure of a looming dissatisfaction.
It is characterized by the following:
- Establish rigid rules of conduct.
- Show little affection or not show affection.
- Do not raise options or only those that are already considered approved in advance.
- Obsessively focusing on abnormal behaviors and excessively recriminating bad behaviors.
In a society based on competition and with a tendency to relax inheritances, values and traditions, non-repressive authoritarian style is an alternative. Even as a form of defense and security against instability and the uncontrolled avalanche of changes.
It offers a kind of benefits that persist in firmness, temperance, in the intention of dealing with unshakable principles in the face of uncertainty. Another advantage derives from their low affective capacity, fostering flat, cold, opportune relationships in a society that has virtualized and even banalized personalities and roles. Seen this way, an authoritarian parenting style can contribute certain positive elements in the shaky world of networks.
Nevertheless, many of its disadvantages come from isolation and lack of feelings. In addition, it tends to generate insecurity and take away initiative from the children; they feel pressured by the possibility of making a mistake.
Those who grew up with authoritarian parents are often reserved, have low self-esteem, and have difficulty setting goals. They tend to be obedient in the presence of authority; without it, they are inclined to make mistakes.
In general, they obey submissively and faced with tests, they are excessively afraid of being wrong. In that sense, it is possible that deep down, parents and children only hide the fear of failure.
Children raised with reasoned and reciprocal authority obey responsibly. They develop self-control and discipline. Authority is exercised by example. In fact, parents present themselves as role models.
It consists of mutual respect and its misrepresentation is authoritarianism. Well conceived, this paternity is an exercise of power, which manifests itself in two aspects: as power of or capacity and how power over or domain. The latter is the one that prevails in the authoritarian parenting style.
It is up to parents to exercise their will in the sense of training, to foster in children their potentialities and their power of creation.
Suggestions to improve parenting style
With the care we give to our children, we want them to learn to resolve conflicts, to know how to manage their emotions, to have skills to relate and adapt to various situations. Being authoritarian or permissive contributes or restricts the fulfillment of these objectives in different ways.
The most negative and questioned point of the authoritarian parenting style is found in the punishment. This practice attempts to correct behaviors and behaviors without offering room for consensus. The result will be a spiral of silence and violence that will make matters worse. And it will not take long to return like a boomerang.
On the contrary, communication, support and affection are at the basis of a style of breeding that respects the person and integrity. Ultimately, the challenge for parents is to ensure that their children are autonomous, that they can solve life’s challenges on their own in an atmosphere of frank and responsible cooperation.
Parenting is a school and you learn from mistakes. From an authoritarian style without restrictions, one can arrive with awareness and reflection to one that starts from understanding, dialogue and agreement.
If there are clear rules that everyone follows, there will be less risk of serious non-compliance. And if the behaviors and attitudes are observed with affection, the deviations can be amended without the primary and irrational exercise of violence.
It might interest you …